Last summer, I began writing a fun project that was only supposed to be a Wattpad story to get my name out there for a bigger book I was working on. It turned into something more. This, at the time, fun side project is called I Eat Vampire Hunters For Breakfast, and is centered around a dramatic and flamboyant vampire named Rubence Sinclair. Sinclair is forcibly taken in by a vampire hunter (Lewis Franklin) who later makes reference to this voice that compelled him to spare the vampire's life and kidnap him so to speak. The story is mostly geared towards young teenage girls who are into fanfiction, anime, and potentially fluffy things like that. The story taps into deep emotion and self reflection, things I wanted to read about when I was a kid but could never quite find the right book.
At first, and very shortly might I add, I decided to try the traditional publishing route while still secretly considering self publishing as an option. Self publishing didn't seem all that exciting right out of the gate, cause all I pictured was crappy cover art, typos everywhere, and the only readers being friends, family, and maybe one or two random fans. I blew it off, much to the relief of those in my life who support traditional publishing. But then I said, why not research this a little though? What could it hurt?
It didn't hurt a thing, instead, I got some pretty legit knowledge I would have never had, had I just continued to be suborn about the whole thing.
All the sudden I started to entertain the idea in my mind; what if I could be a successful, self published author? But I soon learned how expensive it would be to go about it the right way; hiring editors, cover artists, marketers, merch, all that adds up. I put the dream of building my own empire away; I was too broke to even think about doing such a thing.
Still, the idea continued to pester me, and every time I sent a query letter to an agent, I felt like I was doing the wrong thing. That's what I wanted before I understood how cool self publishing could be, but that's not what I wanted anymore. I felt trapped. I felt like I was just sending queries out just because "that's what you're supposed to do." I'm not hating on the traditional route by any means, but like my characters, I had a voice that was telling me to do something, and I desperately wanted to listen.
One day I just realized that I've felt the desire to self publish for far too long and foolishly just kept going in the opposite direction. I knew I wanted to self publish because I can share with the world exactly what's on my mind (with the help of editors and artists of course) I can market it to the people I want to market it to. I can do all the hard work myself, and there's something very appealing to me when it comes to planting ones own roots. So I scrapped the "I have no money, I have to do it the traditional way or it's not the right way" bs away and messaged an editor who came highly recommended to me by the owner of my favorite used bookstore. I messaged her, and told her I finally was ready to suck it up and do it. I followed my heart that day, Sunday, April 7th, 2019.
I'm actually not Walt Disney. I cant just wish on a star and hope someone else will do the work for me if I'm lucky enough to find the right agent and publisher. That's great if you are, but that's just not me. I'm more like Thomas Edison; I wanna get my hands dirty, and I'm no longer afraid to fail even if it means failing a thousand times before I get it right.
I'm going to do this. I promised myself. I have to. I'm gonna work extra hard to save up that money and do this the right way. I'm proud of my story, but I need help from experts to get it to how I really want it, something worthy to be shared and loved by the world. I want my fictional children to have only the finest.
My decision to self publish is not because I don't want agents and publishers telling me no; I got my first no from someone, and you better believe I'm gonna frame it. My editor is gonna tell me no, that something may not fit in the story. Hell, she already called me out on something I never would have thought of when I gave her a sample, and I'm glad she did. I'm not afraid of no. I'm afraid of being that person who doesn't have the guts to make their dreams come true. I love the idea of self publishing because I am the one responsible for making sure everything looks great and is marketed properly. The Chris Top Program's sponsor, Randy at Magnolia Emporium, has already suggested a wonderful artist I should hire for the cover art, and even offered to have a signing in the store! Many of my friends are excited about it, and I know some great people who will help me in areas I lack knowledge in, as well as promote my story. I'm going to be heavily relying on my support system, and I'm excited to see my journey unfold. I want this. It feels right.
I will be posting several updates on this topic. Advice given to me by supporters, how I deal with nay sayers, cope with self doubt, what I do right, what I do wrong, everything. This is the beginning. My dream is no longer just a dream, it's becoming a reality.
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